2010-12-16 New HDTV

Linda's big TV that weighs 4,280 lbs. finally gave up the ghost recently.  It was still playing but would sometimes make strange noises as the picture went weird on us. 

So we decided to take the plunge and buy one of the new wide-screen HDTVs.  We settled on a Phillips 47 inch 1080p 120Hz LCD model.  I had my eyes on a Sony Bravia 55 inch LED model with internet capability but the Phillips was only half as much.  It's probably a close out model that will go on sale next week for half what I paid for.

I also had to buy a tv table / stand / whatchamacallit-thingamabob for the new tv.  The stand comes from China where the instructions to piece it together were translated from Mandarin to English by an ignorant Swahili.  You've seen the type instructions, "Put tab 4 into slot A, three (3) screws ZZ into hole QB, and so on in logical sequence."  It was so simple, any 13-year-old with 20 years experience and an MIT degree could do it.

So we cheerfully invited our 13-year-old grandson over to help.

For the rest of the day we fielded the endless questions, "What's this for?" and "Can I do it?  Let me do it.  I know how to do that."  It only took us 10 hours to put the thing together. 

Mounting the HDTV on the stand of course took all of 15 minutes.  
That was the first time we mounted it which, naturally, was too low for anything to go under it.

By then it was evening.  My grandson had urgent business elsewhere, something about a video game he desparately needed to play, and called his mom to come get him. 

I was alone with Linda again.  Together we un-mounted the TV, removed the pedestal from its base, adjusted the mounting hardware, and mounted it back again.  The HDTV installation gods must have smiled on us.  We got it right the 2nd try.

The tv stand is a handsome piece carefully modeled not to go with any other furniture in our living room.  The engineering is as flawless as the craftsmanship.  There are two drawers in the center slightly too large to store DVDs and VCR tapes.  It has two storage bins, one on either side of the drawers, with adjustable shelves.

There are attractive glass doors cleverly designed to obscure the remote control from getting through.  This is not a problem because the shelves are too small for my equipment to fit any way but sideways.  This of course renders the IR receivers inaccessible to anyone but tiny little elves with miniature remote controls.

For this reason I've determined the tv stand must have been manufactured by elves like the Keebler Cookies variety except not as sweet.  We arranged our DVD players and sound system on top in an attractive manner.  This places all my dials, knobs, and switches at the precise height for our toddler grandchildren.  What a smart way to entertain the kiddies.  Why didn't I think of that!

We called Dish Network to come fix our satellite thingy.  We're among those evil consumers who actually want to watch our new TV instead of just look at it.  With just an 18 year extension to our contract and $75 cash our technician should arrive to do the job in 6 to 8 weeks.  For Christmas, we're thinking of decorating the new tv with ornaments and placing presents around the base.